Dream 2

Agnes was going to prom, she had on the crazy color dress at my shop and hair like Marie Antionette.  She and Laura got in the car with two guys I didn't know before I could take a picture of them.  I asked where they were going and they wouldn't say so I jumped in my car to follow them but I lost them.  I had a giant pit in my stomach that something was going to happen to them and raging anger.  At post prom I was on the stage helping with a game of some sort and I saw Laura and Agnes pop up from sleeping between the chair aisles.  Their hair was all down.  I got up furiously and Agnes shuttered.  I stormed down and grabbed her, pushed her around and yelled at her for going off with these guys.  I took her home immediately. 

I woke up feeling awful for the behavior that I displayed in my dream, but realizing I am very emotionally connected to this host daughter of mine.

Week 3- 2013

This week was a lot of Farm to School (4 to be exact).
It was also the first week of play practice, which consisted of a read through and some music practice.

At the Sushi Bar at Tiger Sushi.

Bryce and I took the family, including Agnes' friend Laura up to the Mall of America for the weekend.  Laura and Agnes spent the day shopping and going to the movies.  Bryce and Link went on rides, played in Lego Land and rested/worked in the hotel.

I went to my first "market" experience as a business owner.  It was a gift mart.  I seem to be drawn to toys a lot so look for a toy booth at whimsy in the coming year or so.  I did get signed up with Kikkerland.  The only thing is I have no budget, so minimum orders are about all I can do and even that is a little scary.  Hopefully I sell a lot of keychains and iphone covers.
It was below zero the entire time we were in Minneapolis.  COOOOLD.

Link got his hair cut this week.  With a lot of prep work I was able to have him get his hair wet and sit by himself rather than on my lap.  He did excellent.  In other good news, Backyardigans is back on the favorite list.  This makes me happy because Link was watching a lot of superhero shows lately with too much violence for my taste.

Bryce and I went to see Lincoln at the cinema.  So good.  I love watching all the Academy movies around this time.  I'm waiting for most to come to Elkader.  Django looks good in previews, but I have never liked a Tarantino movie so I am hesitant to see it.  I also am hesitant to see Life of Pi since it my all time favorite book.  So that leaves Les Misérables and Zero Dark Thirty in Elkader.  Silver Linings Playbook in Prairie.  And Amour and Beasts of the Southern Wild on dvd since I missed them in the theater.

Week 2- 2013

On Monday I interviewed for the job as Program Coordinator at the Clayton County Extension Office.  The interview went well and I was offered the position on Friday. 

I held play auditions of Tuesday and have a great cast itching for their scripts this coming week. 

Farm to School began for January.  This month we are featuring sweet potatoes and Driftless Organic CSA. 

Link returned to tap/gymnastic, in tears, but came out saying "That was SOO fun!"  He has been really interested in learning this week.  We did the Lego Challenge in his magazine of making something that would put out fire.  He decided to make a hose. 

Foggy weather delayed school on Friday. 

I attended another women's circle.  It was at the Creativity Center in Guttenberg.  That is a really cool place. 

On Sunday we had the Hefels over for dinner and had Jason help up put some shelving up in the kitchen.  YAY!  We now have a functioning kitchen!!!  Stella and Coos tore the place up, but it was fun for Link to have kids over.  And I learned the power of magic eraser.

Decisions Made

So I recently posted about a few things giving me anxiety and how I couldn't wait for the end of the week when decisions would be made.  Well, decisions are all made. 

1. The musical. I had auditions on Tuesday.  A new-comer boy showed up and showed tremendous talent as well as coachability, so I easily put together my cast list and put my worries to rest.  Well, the day before I was to  put the cast list up, the Senior I wanted to be in the show called me and asked to be in it.  He had been sick for two days so he had a little bit of an excuse, although he was there the day I passed around the sign up sheet.  So I had to wrestle with where to put him or to move the new kid.  After lots of thought, I did give the Senior the part I intended for him and moved the new kids to a lesser role.  Let's see if I kick myself for doing this later.

2. The job.  I did get offered the position at the extension and I accepted.  I will be recording my first hours on January 23.  They plan to let me work small at first and then grow into a bigger position, but never to exceed 30 hours.  When I think about this job I automatically get anxious.  It is the right thing at the wrong time.  But maybe not.  So many uncertainties.  And there is one thing I know about myself, I don't like waiting for answers. 

Weird Dream

I had a dream that Link was actually my high school boyfriend's child and he and his wife were meeting him for the first time.  They were of course in awe of him and I really was worried that they might want to spend more time with him then in the past, because our situation was so good.  I was also wondering why he deleted me as his facebook friend when I always am posting about Link.  I was worried that when Link called Bryce "Superdad,"  his real dad was offended.  It felt like our family was on display, but we were passing with flying colors as to how much we loved eached other.

I started having a conversation with someone there about how nice I was.  That I returned a ring I found in an airplane to an aquantiance of hers and a wallet to someone who left at a frozen yogurt place I had been to.  I was thinking this talk was really showing Link's dad that I was of great character.  Probably because I think he thinks I am a jerk, since I broke his heart so many years ago.

I also started to think about hs boyfriend's two daughters and how they were Link's half sisters and maybe he should meet them.  As I started coming to I realized I had Link ten years after I had last kissed this man and this was just a dream.  AWAKE.

Anxiety City

I haven't slept well in two days nor has my heart stopped galloping. 
I have two major things on my mind that will all be resolved this week.

1. I am doing the musical and I chose one that would work with the two Seniors that have been in all my other shows.  Both men. 
One of them did not sign up to be in the show!
It is a very challenging role that I don't think there is anyone else capable of doing it at the school.  Also, I don't even have enough men signed up for the show to make the show happen. 
I need to talk to him, but I don't know if I can convince him to do so.  I need divine intervention.

2. I interviewed for a the extension program assistant in Elkader.  It is very similar to the work I was doing last year with afterschool programming, but it is closer, better paying, part-time, and permanent.  I haven't even been offered the job yet, but I am scared that if I do, I don't know what I want to do. 
My term with AmeriCorps is not over until August and the musical is just starting, so for three months I could possibly be working 4 jobs! 
Despite the low pay and travel of the job in Prairie, I will miss the companionship and the people I work with as well as working for a goal I really like.  There is a possibility of signing on for another year (but then that is all I could do) but if I took this other job I wouldn't do that. 
Then there is Lincoln.  I am very happy with my life right now (except for income) because I feel like I get to spend equal time working and with Link.  I will definitely not have this. 
We were also planning on trying to have another baby.  I know I am dead tired while pregnant.  Could I even handle this.  I don't know if I would want to work more after I have a baby.  So would that be fair to even take the position. 
But maybe it will be the perfect fit.  They said the job is flexible hours.  It might work perfectly, especially if I didn't have the Farm to School position anymore.
If anyone out there is reading this and wants to weigh in, please do.  I need all the help I can get.
Again, I haven't even been offered the position, but the interview went really well.

Week 1- 2013

The band warming up.

Bryce and I went to Decorah for New Years Eve.  I love dancing in Decorah because everyone is so free on the dance floor.  It was so fun.  Intergalactic Cowboy Orchestra plaued.  After the countdown, Bryce and I went to Brenda's to spend the night under ultra-warm woolen blankets.  In the morning we went to Scott and Lisa's house for a New Year's day "Good Luck" dinner with black eyed peas and collard greens. 

When we got home Bryce and I had the ambition to clean the house and check a lot of things off our to-do list from last year.  This including switching out almost all our chemicals with naturally made products and building a closet.  We got a new cordless drill while in Decorah, which helped a lot too.

Otherwise I have been busy at Whimsy Market.  I was expecting a sudden, lull, but things haven't slowed down too much.  I am trying to have some more classes to bring more people in.  Amanda Rhine came down from Decorah to talk about a liquid supplement she uses.  Unfortunately no one came, but we did have some good conversations about her summer programs at Discover Happy.

Today we went snowmobiling at Cheri and Jonathan Moser's family farm.  They had the snowmobiles.  It was the first time driving for all of us and we had a lot of fun.  Even Link rode around a little with us and didn't want to get off.